Wednesday, February 21, 2007

And potatoes are vile

Just like tea is evil, potatoes are vile, which is a different word with the same number of letters and the same letters. Potatoes are in league with tea which is secretly in league with all the hidden terrorists of this world, i.e. President Bush. But I digress.

So, I managed to burn the inside of my mouth with one such vile potato a few days ago. It was not hard at all. Please everybody: a round of applause? Thank you. Your intelligent friend here (yep, that would be me) grabbed a potato from the baking tray and stuffed it inside her mouth. You see, when I touched it, it seemed all nice and cold on the outside, but then, as I started chewing, it revealed its sizzling hot inside. I felt like I had a shot of lava in my mouth, but like the idiot that I am, instead of spitting it out, I continued chewing. To be more graphic, I huffed, puffed, inhaled/ exhaled with my mouth wide open like a toad and making appropriate noises to indicate I was burning. One would only expect I would spit it, but noooo. I went on chewing nonetheless, my right hand fanning the inside of my mouth deliriously, my feet dancing a mysterious jig of distress. It was the potato or me. The potato did not survive but left a legacy of third degree burns in my mouth. Now I am carefully considering my next trick. Who needs a hairdryer when one can stick his or her head inside the microwave oven? I'll tell you once I've tried it.

3 comments:

Writer said...

*applauds*
But I love potatoes.
And tea.
Also cabbage. :)

kleinevos said...

I have to agree with high heels, potatoes, tea and cabbage is where it is all at. My darlin you just need to toughen up :P

I command thee... boil yourself a kettle of tea, and drink it down like there is no tomorrow. Never again will any potato be too hot... nor will you ever have a problem with your bladder again :P

kleinevos said...

Darlin I can't figure out who you are on bookcrossing. :P Can you let me know somehow... perhaps smoke signals or something more modern like email? :) *Wink*

Oh I've mailed you a little something :) Hope you get it soon! HUGS!