Life is
degrees of hard and absurd. Maybe it’s the planets. I can rephrase a famous
poet’s last words and say I had a lover’s quarrel with God, not the world.
These
aren’t good days. These are days to stay indoors and avoid all electrical
appliances. Psst. Wear a helmet too, just to be sure.
Life is also
degrees of unfair, and the only actual source of solace and comfort are
friends. You can pray all you want, light all the candles that you want, but
there will be no answer. Or maybe I am persona non-grata, and the rest of you
are fine with the Almighty Asshole, so don’t listen to me. Pray on. See if He
gives a fuck.
I scratch
my head as I am considering ways of burning down the heavens. So far I’ve
disregarded three plans and I am looking for possible flaws in a fourth.
I am also
considering having more tattoos and blowing my brains out, but those are just
silly thoughts, the exasperation of the slave that has been a punching bag, a
toilet girl, and ashtray and a mule for her entire life. Oh, did I mention free
therapist/ healer as well? Write that down under everything else. Now look at
the title, it has my name, my photo, and the 'mysterious' inscription ‘idiot-sucker-moron’ next to it. In impressive big red letters. With the additional
information/clarification “desperate to please” noted just under that. What a
CV.
I valiantly
offer my middle finger and piss on the shadow of every power hungry pantheon of
the planet. I am so sick of you, you fucking pushers, pimps and bullies of
human despair. I shit on you. I defy you. I deny you. I’ll make you pay,
Spider Jerusalem style. I swear I will, even if it takes away everything I
have. I haven’t got much left to begin with, since you took it all away. Sanity
isn’t compatible with the kind of life I am left with.
I refuse to
live here. I want to pack my stuff and leave, go away to some plane that isn’t
governed by deities with a small dick and a big opinion on themselves and their
equally small-minded Renfield-like followers. Those sad idiots do the dirty
work for free, they are so narrow-minded and easy to control that they create a
living hell in a place that was supposed to be neutral ground aspiring to
heaven. And I see these humans everywhere. Everywhere. They are the threshold
keepers, always knowing better and deciding whether you are to be allowed in
the ‘elite’ or not. They are the priests, or the defenders of normality in
various positions, telling you what is normal and what isn’t natural and God
looks down upon you and will burn you for it. They are politicians, licking the
asses of each other and the asses of multinational corporations and banks and
stepping on the backs of everyone else. They are even the rude person who
steals your place in a queue, the neighbour that minds your business instead of theirs, the parent who raised you to be unhappy for the rest of your life.
By the
curses of my grandmother, I fart in their weddings and shit on their properly
mowed grass. They can go suck my fuck.
I want an
exploding vagina. I want big fucking guns and ammunition. I want lethal boobs.
I want to rid humanity of a few dozen deities who drink the blood of the
innocents and revel in our pain and entrapment. I want to squash these bloated
leeches who are feasting on our dreams, our happiness and our good fortune. I
want to stomp and dance on their corpses. I want to find a way to bring down
the veil and release the planet of this tyranny. First and foremost I want to
release myself from their tyranny.
They say if
you want something, really want something, you might get it. I won’t leave this
to chance. I'll work towards it. We’ll see.
You’ll see. You have been warned.
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